It's Valentine's Day. It's Hallmark Day. It's the first one in 6 years I've spent it alone. I never knew what it felt like to become sick with loneliness. But like me tell you, after 8 hours of school with girls with bears/chocolates/flowers and boys with beautiful girls to give those things to, I want to break down. I know, I shouldn't be so into this made up day. It's hard though, when the boy you want to be with doesn't even talk to you. I thought for sure he was going to ask me out for tonight, but I've realized just because he is talking to me, doesn't mean he's into me. I hate this. Am I really that awful as a person? Am I really that ugly as a whole? Maybe I am, maybe I just luck into relationships. Last night I was so upset about the matter that I nearly called the crazy stalking ex-boy friend to tell him I was sorry I broke up with him and that I missed him. Wow, if only you knew the way he acted you would know Hallmark Day really has me emotionally messed up.